A Little Naive

I didn’t mean to, but I am pretty sure I offended one of my customers this morning.  

It started out fine. I complimented her on her purple shirt. She told me she was a purple person.  I told her purple was my mom’s favorite and my sister’s.  

And then… I was hit with the stupid stick.

I’m not sure what compelled me to share this with an old lady, but it just came out. I told her purple was my oldest son’s favorite as well and he recently died his hair purple. 

She made a bit of surprised look, so I quickly followed  up with “It will wash out.”. Then I think I said…it’s the in thing these days. Also, I said my son was the coolest kid in school now. 

Oh but wait, it gets worse. I can’t help myself, stuff just comes out of my mouth. 

She told me her grandkids went to private school where they didn’t allow that sort of thing. 

So I said I went to private school because I can’t stop talking for some reason. 

Then she told me that they chose private school blah blah, something about morals. I don’t remember the exact words because finally it clicked that this was going to go badly. 

She says to me, something about the values learned in private school…(Where I live, private school means Catholic school. ) …something blah blah something… when you got out in to the real world? 

Why I answered this question truthfully, I just don’t know. Especially with a customer I see on a regular basis. It wouldn’t have been so bad if she wasn’t in her eighties. 

I said to her…I felt a little naive. 

Yep.  I said “I felt a little naive “. Then I said something about not realizing there was so much out there and that I didn’t really know what was going on in the world. 

Oh yeah, it was that bad.  As soon as I start feeling like I put my foot in my mouth, I get panicky and I will just blabber on and on. 

I don’t even know how the conversation ended because at that point all I could think about was what an idiot I am. I do remember saying that we couldn’t afford private school for our kids. Luckily, I was able to hold back that we wouldn’t have sent them to private school even if we could afford it. 

Naivety and purple hair combined, I’m probably not her favorite bank teller anymore. 

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Why I must quit TV

Have you seen the commercials that encourage binge watching? There was one from T-Mobile about Binge Watchers Anonymous. One from Amazon pitching a cure for “Show Hole”. My favorite from Visine letting you know their product will help you watch all night long. I’ll admit I was relieved that I wasn’t the only one. The only binge watcher I mean.

Once a series sucks you in you just have to power through the whole story. I can hear you guys nodding your heads. Why do we do it, but more to the point why are companies encouraging us to binge watch? Don’t feel guilty about letting TV take over your life, here’s some unlimited streaming time.  Don’t worry about when your series is over we’ve got more TV over here than you can watch in your entire lifetime! No need for everyone to know you didn’t stop watching House of Cards last night until dawn, we’ve got the cure for your red eyes! And so on and so forth.

We all laughed at those commercials because they were funny. They were. But what does this say about us as a society? That we’re a society of couch potatoes. Did you ever notice when you were spending those hours watching someone elses story , that none of the people in that story were watching TV, almost none. Those TV characters have better things to do.

I will be honest, I have not watched House of Cards. I already know what you’re going to say. It’s amazing! I believe you, because Kevin Spacey. But there are just too many episodes now. If I start watching I won’t stop and then nothing will get done .

All I have to do to free up time for writing and reading and what ever craft I might be obsessed about at the moment, is stop watching TV. Tonight before you go to sleep try to remember how many shows you watched today. How many hours did that take up? What could you have done with those hours that would have made you happy?

Growing up in the 70s and 80s I thought my family was rich because we had two TVs. One in my parents bedroom and one in the living room. Then my dad set up tiny portable TV in the kitchen. We also had a Commodore 64, which as you know hooked up to a tiny TV because it was just a keyboard and floppy disk drive. Floppy what now? Oh you millennials, you can Google it.

So now we had four TVs! We weren’t really rich. I knew we were very lucky to have more than so many. Sally Struthers commercials for Feed the Children or whatever that charity was taught me that. True story.

I have always been an avid reader. My mother never was, so I’m not sure how that happened, as my father ignored us because we were girls.

I would read two sometime three or four Sweet Valley High books in a day. (I’m not good with people.) I love a great story! Sweet Valley High is not a very good example of that, but I like all genres. Mostly. Well, as long as it’s fiction or fiction. Though I’m sure you’ll agree that Sweet Valley High and Nancy Drew really can’t compete with Different Strokes or Family Ties, Good Times or 70s and 80s Saturday Night Live! Are you kidding me?

My Mom used to ground me from TV. I could go outside and play but I couldn’t watch TV. Which, as you can imagine, is traumatic equivalent of taking away your kid’s phone. But I didn’t go outside. I just went back to my books. I read Sherlock Holmes, Poirot, and Miss Marple. I read the Iliad and the Odyssey and Shakespeare. I had a collection of Robin Cook, Dick Francis, Dean Koontz and Tom Clancy. I even read the Bible Genesis through Exodus of my own free will but it was sooooooooo boring I had to stop reading it. And you can only take so much begetting. The Bible is the driest naughty story I’ve ever read.

I’ve learned a lot from TV, I admit. I know all about serial killers and the British Monarchy. I have seen all the good documentaries on Netflix. Sometimes I tell myself that I am only allowed to watch documentaries or actual movies that have an ending , but you can never stick to that. Because everything has a sequel or two or five, and then you’ve got to watch all of those so you can get the whole story.

I’ve got dozens of saved drafts, sewing projects, and jewelry projects. I’ve got rooms to paint. There so many things I’m interested in doing and learning. TV gets in my way.

As of right now I have not watched any TV in the past 43 hours and counting. Believe me when I say this is an achievement. (Did you know you can flat out lie to people, surround the lie with some “Believe me, Believe mees” and people will believe anything you say! That’s crazy right? ) I did some reading then I vacuumed and steam cleaned the hallway carpet.

It was touch and go for a minute as I felt the need to have some Rocky Road, I almost caved. Because I can’t just eat ice cream. I have to be reading or watching something at the same time. When I opened my laptop the screen was on the book I had been reading, so I read instead. And this too would’ve been my downfall as I will lose myself in a book just as easily.

Luckily for me, I am reading a book called Write Good or Die: Survival Tips for the 21st century . It is a collection of essays from writers to writers. The post it happened to be on was titled Discipline by Kristine Kathryn Rush. You can have 3 guesses what that was about.

So, inspired by Kristine, I stopped reading and cleaned the hallway. It’s not much I know. However, I did write these 941 words and counting and that makes me happy. I’m 42 years old and I’ve wanted to be a writer since freshman English. It’s time to put up or shut up.

My name is Madam Fickle and I’m a TV addict.



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Why Bernie Sanders Still Can — and Should — Win the Nomination

“Why Bernie Sanders Still Can — and Should — Win the Nomination” – http://www.huffingtonpost.com/rose-ann-demoro/why-bernie-sanders-still_b_10154256.html

Trump must be stopped at all costs. I don’t have any jokes today. This is a moral imperative. Trump must be stopped.

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The Believers



Just as Stevie Miles clicked off her TV and tossed the remote onto the seat next to her, a boom of thunder shook the old house slightly after a loud crack and flash of lighting. The wind was blowing strongly outside. Now that the TV was silenced she could hear the haunting creak of the swing set out in the back yard. Creepy, like that moment in the horror film right before they kill the cheerleader. Fitting given the circumstances she thought.

She walked barefoot through her small 3 bedroom ranch house to the kitchen and poured another glass of Merlot. Unbelievable, she thought shaking her head in disgust. The 37-year-old proceeded to walk the house, wine in hand, checking the door locks and shutting off the lights.

Stevie grabbed a new composition notebook and a pen from her desk before retiring to her bedroom. She brushed her long auburn hair up into a ponytail and began to wash her face. After finishing up her bedtime yoga routine with the warrior pose, she sat down on the king size bed, her back propped up with pillows against the wall. After another sip of wine she loaded her one hitter. After a couple hits Stevie could feel her mind start to calm, she took several deep breaths and began to write.

November 8, 2016

Let me preface this journal by saying I don’t feel it safe to write the truth on my laptop. Strange to feel so paranoid. Now that the election is over I fear there is no safe form of communication. However, a record of these events must be kept. If you find this journal it’s likely that I’m dead. You must make sure the truth gets out.

I never considered myself a conspiracy theorist or particularly political for that matter. However fantastic the following may seem I believe it to be the truth and I believe we’re all in danger. Roland Drumpf is now officially President-elect of the United States of America. A day I never believed could happen.

When Drumpf announced his candidacy we all thought it was a joke. It was definitely a media circus. But his followers grew in number and we had to face the fact that Roland Drumpf would be the Republican nominee. I feel like a truck just hit me and it’s not the Merlot. When Senator Ernie Sandberg became the Democratic nominee I had faith, a lot of us did, that Drumpf would be defeated.

Shortly after the Democratic National Convention, Senator Sandberg and his entire family were killed in a gas explosion at a banquet facility. They were celebrating his grandson’s bar mitzvah.

After Senator Sandberg was killed, former First Lady and Secretary of State, Helen Chilton became the Democratic nominee. The first woman ever to be nominated for the office of President. While it’s long past time the USA had a woman president, I knew in my heart the country would not elect her. Half the country felt she already had her 8 years in the White House while her husband was the President, also she just wasn’t likeable. Drumpf’s attack ads were relentless. The media seemed to wholly turn against her, as if he owned it.

So now here we are, only 74 days from destruction.

I know there are a lot of people out there that don’t believe that explosion was an accident. The rumors of assassination and secret meetings between Drumpf and the heads of major media organizations and the far right are countless. I don’t think Chilton stood a chance. And it wasn’t just her. Democrats didn’t stand a chance.

The Republicans have total government control now. I fear this is a nightmare that is just beginning.

Stevie set down the pen and wiped a tear off her cheek.Better get some sleep, there’s a lot of work to be done. She drank the last of her wine, turned out the light and prayed quietly for the future of humanity. Forgive them, for they know not what they do.

*Author’s Note: This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely for entertainment purposes. Also this is under copyright, so please don’t steal.




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Why Republicans Oppose the Iran Agreement: Follow the Money

Why Republicans Oppose the Iran Agreement: Follow the Money – http://huff.to/1Iun0hF

This is a really great article. Just thinking about what the folks in D.C. are doing or are not doing makes my head spin.

I never gave any thought to what our government was up to until we had the boys.

If we want to truly have a government that is for the people, the people (that’s us) need to pay attention.

It doesn’t matter if you’re on the right, on the left, or in the middle. Do your homework. Don’t vote because so and so said blah blah blah. Seek out the truth for yourself. Think for yourself.

Think for yourself.

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Why Not?

Why Not? – http://huff.to/1FOToFK

This is an excellent article from presidential candidate Bernie Sanders.  Pass it on!

The whole political scene is giving me nightmares.

I don’t know about you guys, but I’m for humanity and the earth.

I’m still doing my homework on the candidates, but so far Bernie is the only candidate who doesn’t sound like a raving lunatic. I’m just sayin’.


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(Insert book title here)


It was a loud pounding on the door that woke Stephanie Michler from her afternoon nap. Technically it was a continuation of the morning/after breakfast nap. If you call an apple and a glass of iced tea breakfast.

“Not again.” she groaned as she shuffled to get a bathrobe.

Her phone buzzed loudly on the bed side table. The text read: “I’m outside, AGAIN. It’s been six months. If you don’t open the door I am going to call the police AND the fire department to come over here and open it for me.”  More pounding. “Don’t think I won’t call!” Stacey announced loudly through the intercom. “I love a man in uniform, I may wind up with a hot date.”

Stephanie rolled her eyes and pressed the intercom button next to her bedroom door.  “Fine! Don’t get your panties in a twist”.

She pulled on her bathrobe as she walked to the front door and began opening a series of locks. Leaving the last lock in place, she opened the door as much as the chain would allow.

Her best friend, Stacey, stood there with a cigarette in one hand and the other on her hip, sunglasses perched on the tip of her nose. “Really? What was that 5 locks?  Please open the door Cookie. Don’t make me go the fire and rescue route.”

“I knew you were bluffing. Are you alone?”

“What? Yes. Please let me in. It’s been six months.”

Stephanie closed the door.  She sighed heavily as she undid the chain lock and stepped back as Stacey pushed her way through.

“Are you hungry ? I brought Bread Co.”

“Yes, I see that.” Stephanie replied flatly as she looked out the front door, her eyes darting around the perimeter. “Did you happen to bring any whiskey or weed?”

“Ignoring that. What are you doing?  I said I was alone, who are you looking for?”

“Just making sure the mothers aren’t with you”.  She closed the door and began to re-lock the sequence on the door.

Stacey looked Stephanie in the eyes and placed her hand lightly on her friends arm.

“Aw Steph, I would never bring your mom here, you know that. Your mother-in-law is a different story.  She seems like she could be scary.  C’mon let’s eat. I got broccoli cheddar soup and bread bowls!”

Stacey made her way to the kitchen of the three bedroom ranch.  She hurried about setting the table, while Stephanie sank into a chair.

“I see you’ve been cleaning.”

“Not much else to do when you’re alone except read, sleep or masturbate. I’ve already read all the books in the house, I sleep 20 hours a day and I currently have no interest in masturbation.”

“Okay….” Stacey took a deep breath and poured two glasses of iced tea.

“Look Cookie, I know you don’t want to hear this, but friends have to tell each other the truth in order to help each other. Firstly, you are not alone. You have a ton of people who love you and are ready to support you if you’ll just let us. We all lose people. Secondly..”

“Stop right there! If you say I’m not the only one whose lost someone here or other people are hurting too, I will punch you in your face.” Stephanie stood up exasperated, her breathing got heavy as she clenched up her hands into fists. “Most people don’t lose their husband and three sons in one fell swoop, so don’t say we all lose people. It is not the same!” She spun herself round and punched a hole in the pantry door. “GOD DAMMIT!” She shook her now throbbing hand and tried to collect herself. “You see! This is why I’m staying away from everyone Stace. Really, I am going to end up punching somebody I love in the fucking face!”

“Hey! Hey hey hey, easy there tiger, let’s bring it down a notch, you’re scarin’ me. You’re right, it’s not the same. I’m sorry. Could we just eat and talk, about something else? Something that doesn’t result in broken fingers? I miss you Steph. We all miss you. Look, I also bought the ginormous and ridiculously overpriced rice crispy treats.”

“Well jeez Stace, why didn’t you say so in the first place. I would’ve opened the door a lot sooner.”

The two women smiled and both felt the tension start to melt. “I don’t think anything is broken.” She reached into the freezer for a bag of frozen corn to soothe her scraped and swollen hand.

They ate quietly. Stacey not wanting to push Stephanie back into shut down mode. She glanced around the kitchen trying to think of what to say that wouldn’t trigger another trip to the dark side. Ceiling to floor the place was spotless and meticulously organized. No clutter, no excess.

“Wow you’ve been cleaning a lot. It looks like a display home in here, are you selling the house?”

As soon as the words left her lips she wished she could hit 10 second rewind. Shit! You’re an idiot. 

Stephanie’s tired smile was replaced by a grimace. She choked back tears and inhaled deeply to steady herself.

“There’s no one around to make a mess.” she replied stiffly. “I couldn’t bear to look at their things. So I, um”, she paused and steadied her self again. “Stace, thanks for coming, really, it was nice to not have to cook a meal. But I’m really exhausted now.”

“It’s only six o’clock.”

“Yeah…I haven’t had this much interaction in a long time, you know so, it was really good, good to see you.  I think that I’m just going to lie down for a while now.”

“Yeah, sure…. okay honey. Just promise me we’ll keep talking. Please?  Okay?” Stacey gathered her belongings, she wanted to get out of there at that point almost as much as Stephanie wanted her to leave. “It’s just that you’ve been ignoring everyone’s calls. We’re all worried about you. It’s not good for you to be alone so long. Tomorrow I’m going to call you and you’re going to pick up alright? Promise me, don’t roll your eyes.”

“Okay, yes I will pick up the phone when you call tomorrow. Scouts honor. I just I’ve got to ease my way back to people Stacey. You know I hate people.”

“I know you hate people. Okay I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“I thought we were going to talk on the phone.”

“You hate talking on the phone.”

“That’s true. Touche. Okay I’ll see you tomorrow…… for a limited amount of time.”

“It’s a start. I’ll take it.”

“Please bring whiskey and weed.”

“Ignoring that. Goodnight Cookie.”

Stacey let out a slow exhale after sliding into her car. She lit a cigarette and turned on the car’s bluetooth.

“Okay Google, send group email Michler sisters.”

Hello ladies. Well she let me in, after I threatened to call fire and rescue.

It’s not what you thought. She seems like she’s eating even though she’s lost a considerable amount of weight, she’s not looking malnourished. Her fridge was filled with fresh fruits and veggies, I saw a cooler for a grocery delivery service. She’s taking her meds, she had current prescription bottles on the counter.

It doesn’t look like an episode of hoarders in there. In fact it’s spotless, I mean eat off the floor clean. I’m surprised her fingers weren’t bleeding type of clean. And sparse. She has no trace of Steve or the boys visible in the house.

When I commented on the lack of mess, she shut down. I did get her to promise I could visit tomorrow. It’s a start.

Look, I know you’re all grieving, but she’s the type of person who needs to process this stuff in quiet solitude. She knows she’s going to lash out and hurt someone and she wants to avoid that. If you push her she may cut you out permanently. We’ve just got to take baby steps.

Also, don’t ask me to gather intel for you again. I feel completely dirty now. She’s my friend, I know her best. Just let her be. She’ll contact you when she’s ready.


Stacey Brunk

Stephanie watched her friend from living room window.  It felt like forever before the car pulled away. She collapsed into the couch and put her head in her hands. After a long while she got up and made her way to the bathroom medicine cabinet for a Xanax. She turned out the lights and got back in bed. Tears streamed down her face as she tried to relax enough to get back to sleep. “Don’t trust anyone.” she whispered to herself. “You can’t trust anyone.”

copyright 2015 Madamfickle. This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to persons living or dead is purely unintentional. Blahbity blah blah blah.

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This man speaks the truth! Put on your listening ears kids.

Bill Maher Slams Critics Of His Comments About Islam – http://huff.to/1IOAEuu

Pass it on.

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Chris Rock: There’d Be Riots If People Knew What Being Rich Was Really Like

Chris Rock: There’d Be Riots If People Knew What Being Rich Was Really Like – http://huff.to/1rOM4oa

Pass it on.

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25 Thanksgiving Jokes That Will Get You Through Dinner With Your Family

25 Thanksgiving Jokes That Will Get You Through Dinner With Your Family – http://huff.to/1riVAj9

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